Toorbul Tornado Tears Trousers off Tremulous Trailblazer

All eyes were on the handicap results in yesterdays decider at Toorbul, our first run at this venue.  But the vast crowd of onlookers and competitors were unprepared for the carnage at the front end where the heat took its toll, and even hotter still were the whispered conspiracy theories as the line honours winner finished a clear minute ahead of his nearest rival.

But the first event of the day was the Kid's 2k with 8 runners lining up.  Thursday nights will see some structured training for the little tackers, nothing too strenuous but some sort of routine to encourage them.  Will and Audrey have offered to supervise but it would be great if everyone offered to lend a hand and share the load.  We’ll also formalise the Kid’s Race in conjunction with Speedy Steve’s Slip Slop Slap Summer Series and find some half decent encouragement awards.

Kids on the line

Leah G finished at the front, as usual looking completely unflustered and untroubled. Brennan and Tim finished side by side then another budding Zorro.  Cameron, Luke and Thomas decided on a big finish, together, and Kirsten completed the field.  The kids had as much fun in the water as on the course.

Daughter and Dad

Now it was the turn of the adults in the last race for 2008.  Sadly Anja could not make the showdown and Steve M was out with a leg injury.  Nevertheless there was faint hope that a last ditch run could put the cat amongst the brightly coloured yet elusive wompoo fruit-doves (Ptilinopus magnificus).

With Sean in the box seat for a series win, it was a surprise to everyone, not least herself, that Mrs G took handicap honours on the day.  Robyn G has struggled with injury for most of the year and actually hadn’t run in any of the prior handicap events this series.  This meant that her finishing handicap in 2007 was increased by the usual 2% for the start of 2008.  Without any prior runs this year, her tentative return at Toorbul was enough to dip under her mark by a creditable 1m 13s to finish first on the day and the only runner under handicap.  She’s back! 

But congratulations must go to Sean who finished second on the day, just 20 seconds off his handicap and a slim 4 seconds ahead of Will.  This meant that Sean’s overall position in the best of four table improved by a couple of points to 188 in total or 1 win and 3 second placings.  In fact, from six performances this series he was placed in all but one event with a 4^th place in the other race.  This obviously demonstrates sustained improvement over the course of the competition which is of course what the handicap series is all about.

How sweet it is.

Second overall was Anja.  Ah, if only Anja!  If only she’d been there or finished a little higher in race 6 but she did send a wonderful email which Laimon read at the finish.  It was a real pleasure having you run with us Anja, good luck in the north and if you are ever down this way you know you and Roland are always welcome at CRR.

Third place to the mighty Zorro just 2 points behind, another perennial place getter and steady improver over both the 8k and the 3k races.  Maybe his time will come next year.  Francis, Laimon and the Tornado not that far really off the placegetters then Bruce, Glen and Macca grouped together. 

Good to have Dave C joins us on the day and he now has a handicap.  Dave is coming back to fitness after years as a footballer and his good wife Jodie popped in to say g'day too.  Their youngster was at the last 3k, and we hope to see them all again soon.

For line honours on the day it was pants down for Parso after he capitulated at the five k mark allowing the British Bulldog to press to the lead and maintain his dominance to the finish.  Earlier Macca dropped out at the 3k mark citing the heat but it was this development which raised eyebrows and started the first of many rumours which threatened to overshadow the principal results.  Was Macca set up to take out the lead at an outrageously fast pace given the trying conditions, as the sacrificial lamb to take the sting out of Parso's withering attack?  Most pundits were hard pressed to remember a premature withdrawal by Macca mid event and all describe Parso's attack as withered rather than anything else.

But with Macca sidelined, Parso pressed his lead with a series of orchestrated surges designed to suck the will of those behind.  They really sucked because Steve H stuck to him like a terrier to a rat – perhaps Uromys caudimaculatus? Despite the heat there was a noticeable nor' easter head wind on the northward journey so Steve tucked in behind the valiant leader, looking for an easy ride in the vortex created by Parso's ears.  Realising this underhanded ploy, Parso immediately slowed down forcing Steve to his shoulder but then surged again as he tried to overtake.  

In tit for tat fashion this went on for about 1k 'till Parso started having flashbacks to the good bad old Blockbuster Video runs with Greg H and Steve H, in none of which was he ever able to finish ahead of the other two.  Suddenly it was de ja vu all over again as Parso headed for a course side water break while Steve slunk past and into the lead.

Up ahead at the 6 k mark , in what was the most outrageous breach of athletic protocol and a clear violation of the Magna Carta, Macca handed Steve a waterbottle to ensure he was adequately hydrated.  There was a muted groan from the assembled crowd at this point as all realised the sheer audacity of this move and officials scattered in all directions to consider precedent.

Parso gamely declined a half hearted similar gesture from Macca, knowing the offered water bottle was probably empty anyway or now full of vinegar or battery acid, and pressed on.

As if this wasn't enough to incite the fair minded crowd to riot and call for equitable play, inside the last k a fellow competitor of the female persuasion perpetuated a blatant falsehood by informing Parso that the lead runner had fallen over and there was every prospect of catching him.  The rumour of a fall was a calculated ruse and to be hit with this false hope in the final straight at a psychological low point was perhaps the cruellest blow of all.  How do these people sleep at night?

The final ignominy?  Post event lying on the road in the shade Parso was informed by Kirsten that he had assumed the "dead cockroach" position and how long was he going to lie there?   It's a cruel world.

Dead cocky

Thanks to everyone for supporting the series in 2008.  At this stage it is planned to kick off in March 2009 with the Mt Mee Tri.  Toorbul will definitely be on our list of venues as will Deception Bay.  If there is somewhere local that you run, preferably off road, which you think everyone could enjoy just let us know.  If the handicap system makes no sense to you, then you must be fitting right in.  But your handicap will be increased by 2% before 2009 to give us all a bit of slack to catch up and if you have any ideas for improvements, just say so.